Open Mike Night at the Cafe: Rockin' the Canon!

SantaMental Greetings

This cafe was built one brick at a time.

The Last Twenty-Ninth

November 2007

À votre santé!

Become a regular visitor here at the Cafe!

Fleurs sur le Noir

Standing Outside a Broken Phone Booth - Primitive Radio Gods

Standing Outside a Broken Phone Booth With Money in My Hand

Jan lays down and wrestles in her sleep
Moonlight spills on comic books
And superstars in magazines
An old friend calls and tells us where to meet
Her plane takes off from Baltimore
And touches down on Bourbon street

We sit outside and argue all night long
About a god we've never seen
But never fails to side with me
Sunday comes and all the papers say
Ma Teresa's joined the mob
And happy with her full time job

Am I alive or thoughts that drift away?
Does summer come for everyone?
Can humans do what prophets say?
If I die before I learn to speak
Can money pay for all the days I lived awake
But half asleep?

A life is time, they teach you growing up
The seconds ticking killed us all
A million years before the fall
You ride the waves and don't ask where they go
You swim like lions through the crest
And bathe yourself in zebra flesh

I've been downhearted baby
Ever since the day we met

Cat of Many Names

Don't worry, he's sugar-coated.

Jess wonders: On what planet is it necessary to advertise sugar?

Love Your Lungs, Love Your Taste Buds.

Jess D'Zerts Cafe is a smoke-free environment.
Live long. Breathe deep. Order the eyeball salad.

Great American Smoke-Out Day, 2007

Millionaires

Fortunately, the foxes have guns.

But he wasn't . . .

Served Red-Hot!

Fresh Hawaiian Eyefish on the Fly

featured in the forthcoming book
Pele's Cooking School: One Fish at a Time
Barbeque like a Goddess!
Lava Roasting, Salt-Water Steaming,
& Other Heavenly Polynesian Techniques

by the renowned author of the best-sellers
Pele's Puke aʻo Lala
(Pele's Book of How to Cook Over a Fire)
and
Pele's Wiwi Pupu Puke
(Pele's Skinny Snack Book)

Mai e `ai Hawaiian Eyefish
Wednesday only at the Cafe.
Reservations required.
Grass skirt attire forbidden.
(Ardis fire ordinance 11-307).

Now Showing at the Ardis Theater

(WordCount 19406-19407 trunchbull pierce
14571-14573 scrum dagger bernie
19337-19339 och tingling bertha
25656-25658 pumpkin shunt screeching)

Italian Sausage and Rice

In a large skillet, lightly brown:

1 pound Italian sausage--sweet or hot, your preference (If your sausage is tubular, either slice it or squeeze it out of the casings and break it up into pieces small enough to share a fork with the other ingredients.)

Remove it from the skillet with most of the fat.
In the remaining fat, cook:

1/2 cup chopped onion
1 garlic clove, minced
1/2 cup diced green pepper
1 cup sliced fresh mushrooms (or a 4-oz. can, drained)

Add to the skillet:

a 1-pound can of tomatoes (diced is good)
1/2 cup ketchup
1/4 teaspoon basil
1/4 teaspoon oregano
1/2 teaspoon sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt

Simmer 5 minutes, stirring frequently.
Remove from heat and add:

2 cups cooked rice (I like Basmati or Uncle Ben's Converted in this recipe)

Put the sausage back into the skillet also, and stir to combine all ingredients well.

Pour into a greased casserole with a cover. (If I remember correctly, my 1.6 liter Corningware French White casserole is adequate unless I double the recipe which, because it's so yummy, I almost always do. This is one of those dishes that's even better the next day.)

Bake, covered, in a preheated 375°F oven for 45 minutes.
Leaving cover in place, remove casserole from oven and let stand for 10 minutes before serving.

Top with chopped fresh parsley if you have it (I rarely do).
Serve with grated Parmesan cheese.

Makes 4-6 servings.

This has always been one of my favorite recipes from Woman's Day Encyclopedia of Cookery (First Edition, c. 1966; Fawcett Publications, Inc., New York; Volume 10, page 1636). The aromas are tantalizing! Cook the Basmati, which means "queen of fragrance,", to whet your appetite while you're cutting up the veggies. Then you might just as well let yourself drool when the sautéing of the sausage releases the beguiling smell of fennel. You're gonna anyway, so just go with it! But don't lean over the skillet!

And unless you're really committed to bland flavors, go with the hot sausage! When all is said and done, it will not be as hot as medium salsa. It will jjust be fabulously, addictively delicious.

The Tuesday Special is a popular choice.

Alma says the eyes are a lot like oysters.
The purple lettuce creeps her out,
but she needs the roughage.

Birthday - The Sugarcubes

She lives in this house over there
Has her world outside it
Scrapples in the earth with her fingers and her mouth
Shes five years old

Thread worms on a string
Keeps spiders in her pocket
Collects fly wings in a jar
Scrubs horse flies
And pinches them on a line
Ohhh...

She has one friend, he lives next door
Theyre listenening to the weather
He knows how many freckles shes got
She scratches his beard

Shes painting huge books
And glues them together
They saw a big raven
It glided down the sky
She touched it
Ohh...

Today is a birthday
Theyre smoking cigars
Hes got a chain of flowers
And sows a bird in her knickers
Ohhh...

Theyre smoking cigars
They lie in the bathtub
A chain of ... flowers

Motus - Seb Martel

Lyrics of Motus as translated by Google Translate:

hold to them your words well
release to them your words well
the words bite, the words kill
you seek them your words
it lose the words
in a dead end

I gum them your words
I digest them bastard
I chew them, your believed words
but they aggravate me these words
traquacent it to me too is
I erase them they ebb

open to see what it leaves

they are connected the words
the words break out
declad themselves, diffuse themselves
in message words
I you grapeshot of textos
blue words of word crudes

of through too
end the wordthe word shocks, small frustrates
open to see what it leaves there
they bersent me your words
upset it to me is beautiful
they charm us but they wear
buckle it and then sleeps

Impulse: A Natural WordCount Poem

(Word Count 712-717: heart sent test attention story written)

The Eyes of Wickum Fhee

Tuesday Special: D'Zerts Salad
Free to the first 100 diners!
(A bargain at twice the price!)

In a purple salad
Are the eyes of Wickum Fhee.
Eat the salad quickly!
Do not let him look at thee!

A Void

Mr. Clean Goes Nefarious

A Front

A Scape

Night and day, you are the one...

Cole Porter, born 9 June 1891

Go for the flying snack.

Jess D'Zerts Cafe features a species-specific menu

for those who eat like a bird.

Unhand Me

Coming Soon to the Ardis Theater

(WordCount 3197-3198 moon matches
2931-2932 dna washington
19349-19351 deformed georg buns
76859-76860 merrin croker
34279-34281 rabid luna lex
79702-79705 toomey laine wotcha nowicka
19394-19396 drummond amorphous mixer
38240-38241 reverent astrological
8310-8311 stella candles)

Not Forgotten

Joe

You know what they say . . .

Have you met my ant & uncle?

Madame Curious

Rogue

paper collage 2004, digitally altered 2007

Five

paper collage 2004, digitally altered 2007

Puzzles We'd Like to See

Speed Sudoku...
for the busy executive or
the logic-impaired Sudoku junkie

Her Day

Nunnayore Business Cards, Invoice No. 7138

(WordCount 35519-35520 dodson autobahn
7138-7143 gerald folly pots swedish monarch lieutenant)

Where My Heart Lives

Mediterranean Bread Salad

Ten years ago, Mediterranean Bread Salad was sure to turn up at every potluck dinner. A year or two later it vanished, maybe because it's better in a bowl than on a plate.

Sometimes I add a little feta cheese and maybe some black olives, and my personal preference is for sweet onion rather than red.

Ingredients:

3 cups leftover wheat or rye bread
1-1/2 cups chopped tomatoes
1 cup chopped cucumber
1/2 cup chopped red onion
2 tablespoons olive oil
3 tablespoons lemon juice
3 tablespoons water (optional as needed)
2 teaspoons dried parsley flakes
1/8 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1/4 teaspoon dried dill weed

Instructions:

Cut bread into bite-sized cubes, spread on baking sheet, and dry in oven at 350 degrees for about 10 minutes. Set aside to cool. (I've been known to skip this step.)

Combine liquids and seasonings in large bowl and whisk to blend. Add the chopped vegetables and mix thoroughly. Add bread cubes last and toss until well mixed.

Chill several hours or overnight, mixing several times. Stir before serving. (Okay, I admit it, I do not get up in the middle of the night to mix my salad. Sue me.)

127 calories/serving (1 veg, 1 fat, 1 bread)

From Lean and Luscious and Meatless by Bobbie Hinman and Millie Snyder (c. 1992, Prima Publishing, Rocklin, CA), p. 106.

The Winters of My Childhood

chalk on construction paper, 1953

After the Run, the Rest

He was much better-looking than this!

Freedom: A 2entences Memoir

My father would glance up from washing the dishes, pound frantically on the window, slide it open, and yell, "Get away from there!" In the far corner of the yard, my dog would turn and look at him, consider the admonition, then climb the chainlink, wiggle between the top rail and the extra wire my father had strung six inches above it to prevent this very occurrence, and take off for his hour of freedom.

Today's Special

Starts Friday at the Ardis Theater

(WordCount 5498-5499 rabbit nightmare
66254-66257 skillful vicenzo mommy uddingston
66266-66269 chiaro pithead mamaloni fribbins
52046-52048 bunnies artless trattoria
12879-12882 brooks deviance bunny rincewind)

The Ardis Snoop: Prostaglandin Studs Unfettered!

(WordCount 23489-23491 prostaglandin studs unfettered
32287-32289 tinnitus undisciplined hiccups
42525-42526 perturbation wilenius
32303-32305 panicky Sidonius excreted
4949-4950 seed fluid
15249-15251 blush stricken vera
66247-66248 purdey swooned
62339-62340: ardis snoop)

Lick This!

Nunnayore Business Cards, Invoice No. 19380

(WordCount 42860-42861 perming parkway
19380-19385 hodgson diplock amicable eastwood corrections lr)

Coming Soon to the Ardis Theater

Hmm, perhaps not coming all that soon...

(WordCount 18928-18929 neal boulder
81595-81596 goodhaven catt
75422-75424 sox bewilder dorney
40880-40881 wiggle footsie
28411-28412 elgin joystick
31603-31604 suzi gassendi
12879-12882 brooks deviance bunny rincewind)

Floorplan

Fabric collage, Spring 1990

Abundance

Spring 1990

Why Jessie's Not a Rock Star

Baby, don'tcha bump me
'Cause I don't wanna cling.
I don't wanna be your velcro woman.
You can take your stuff and cram it, damn it.
I ain't gonna let you jam it.
I ain't gonna be there when you're comin'.

Lyrics found in an old writing notebook. Melody forgotten. I have no idea when I wrote this, but apparently I was a little pissed off at someone!

May the luck of the Irish enfold you.

Questin' an Anser

Big honkin' boo-boo,
lookin' for a good goose in
all the wrong places...

Sunday Morning

Genetic Manifesto

"Let the staid throat tear free
in a glorying growl of creation...."
--Bonnie Elizabeth Parker--

Fingerpaints: not just for kindergardeners anymore!

My late aunt, Bonnie Elizabeth Parker, was an extraordinary poet.
Enjoy her work daily throughout 2007 at Dark Tigers.

Heart

Heart of my garden,
keeping seasons' rhythmic beat --
bud, leaf, flame, weep, sleep.

photo & haiku, autumn 1994

Nunnayore Business Cards, Invoice No. 80799

(WordCount 18338-39: pendulum boulevard
80799-800: elopement trendies)

Mothersea

Drawn to the ocean
I walk along this crescent beach
stopping to nudge a starfish
or overturn a shell,
the briny sealife smell a primal pull.
I think of evolution, and the womb.
I feel full with life.

I first came to this beach
in a childhood dream.
I walked along this strip of sand
surrounded by portentous cliffs, and
there was no escape
when the huge sea reached up to take me.
Today I feel no fear. I'm grown
and can take care of myself here.

Now the rhythm of the water's surge and ebb
is broken
by a sneaker wave
heaving toward me darkly.
I stumble up a great black rock,
grasping at gritty crags,
pulling myself from the ocean's reach.
The sneaker wave takes the beach,
crashes on rocks below my feet,
splashes, salty, over me.

Gasping, I wait for the wave's retreat,
jump from the rock
and run up the beach
cold and wet and foolish.

written ca. 1991

Progress: A 2entences Memoir

Fifty years ago, the neighbor shot my dog with a pellet gun for peeing on his shrubbery, but times change. That type-A bastard died young, and "PISS ON BUSH" has evolved from landscape no-no to placard-worthy political sentiment.

Nunnayore Business Cards, Invoice No. 50492

(WordCount 50492-50496 gresley reenan indigent brainwashing transputers)

What's Cookin'

Psychedelic flapjacks?